Ever have those days where it feels like the combined strength of your best java, Extra Strength Tylenol and hours of intensive therapy couldn’t possibly get you through your waking hours? Those head-exploder days where all your worries have bubbled into a seething mass of unmistakable stress?
We’ve all been there. Whether it’s a personal feud or a professional snafu, worries about family or a problem we just can’t resolve, we’ve all encountered those times in our lives. I recently had one head-banger of a week where I was at a professional crossroads and needed to focus on my career. I had to pack for a family vacation– which was something to look forward to, but still… packing? For me, plus three kids? Still, I knew I could handle it.
But then there’s an ER run in the midst of it. Nothing hugely serious, but there’s the hours and hours of sitting and waiting to see a doctor. The hours between tests. The hours staring at the walls while you’ve got so many places to be. In no time, I’m worried, stressed and falling flat on my face in every arena of my life and no amount of Starbucks or sedatives make a dent.
They say laughter is the best medicine, but I’m going to argue it’s friendship. Because I’ll tell you I couldn’t have made it through last week without the support of a good friend, the kind of friend who always knows the right combination of compassion and cheerleading to make a wreck of a day better.
This friend doesn’t just sympathize with your problems. She’ll shout and cry about them with you so you don’t have to be mad or sad alone. But then, she’ll help you figure out a new approach to help you deal with whatever you’re going through, so you go from crying or shouting to something more productive. And yeah, maybe there are even a few irreverent laughs along the way to uplift you.
I couldn’t get through life without my friends. Their shoulders have carried my burdens more times than I can count and I can only hope that I give them back half as much strength, courage and inspiration as they’ve given me.
*** Do you have a friend or group of friends you can’t be without? Tell us about a time a friend proved better than therapy for you! For that matter, share the link to this post with a friend and tell her how much you appreciate her. One random poster to the thread will have a win my May release, UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL. I’m on vacation this week, so please do bear with me if I’m a bit later than usual posting a winner. Thanks to that friend in question, I did get my bags packed. 
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I think friends are the shining light during our moments of uncertainty and doubt. They help us see what we cannot, and talk us down from the ledge when life has gotten overwhelming.
I have a wonderful friend who’s always willing to listen, no matter what, and yet she has more than her own problems to deal with. Her husband is quadraplegic and cannot communicate unless by computer, and must have 24-hour care in their home, yet she is always, always so strong. I once blogged about her awhile back because she truly is my hero. Whenever I think my life sucks, I remember all she goes through every single day, and thank God for bringing her into my life.
by Stacy ~
on April 15th, 2008 at 6:15 am
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I’m glad things are looking better now, Joanne, and I hope you have a blast on your vacation.
I had a similar experience to yours over a decade ago. I was moving internationally, waiting on the moving company to pack my stuff. At the same time, I was selling the apartment, the car, closing bank accounts, selling some of the furniture and other stuff, and doing the thousand things necessary to end a chapter before starting the next. Being more than slightly anal, I had a plan–prioritized, timed, scheduled. Every single thing to do listed and considered, and planned for.
And then migraine struck, the day the movers were coming. One of those attacks where light or dark, silence or deafening noise, you can’t tell the difference because your stomach is churning and tears leak out of your eyes from the pain, and you simply. can’t. think.
Which was when one of my dearest friends showed up, out of the blue. She tucked me in bed at one end of the apartment, took the phone with her, and stayed all day long to keep an eye on the guys packing my stuff, making sure they were quiet as mice–and returned the following day, bright and early, in case I needed to stay in bed longer and needed her to take charge of the packing again.
We haven’t seen each other in years–different countries and all–but we still talk regularly, and I always remember her generosity and kindness when things get rough.
by azteclady
on April 15th, 2008 at 8:44 am
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I know I am a great sounding board for my friends… I am the one they seem to always come to with problems. When I have a problem I turn to my sister… she is the best one to turn my mood around!!! Here is to our friends!!! 
by Colleen
on April 15th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
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boys bobys boys, they are always there for me when i had boy trouble. tehy listen and tell me i can find better than him lol.
by kim h
on April 15th, 2008 at 12:51 pm
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I wouldn’t be able to survive without friends who stand by me at all times. Someone who won’t leave you alone at a bar or let you walk home alone at night and understands where you’re coming from with your views and thoughts.
by Jane
on April 15th, 2008 at 2:58 pm
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My sister was killed in a horseback riding accident three years ago. My best friend dropped evrything and drove over 100 miles to be with me until my husband got home from work. I think I would have gone around the bend without my friend.
by Estella
on April 15th, 2008 at 3:27 pm
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Great topic, Joanne! Friends are the BEST! I’m blessed to have several who I know I can count on, and the very dearest is my sister. Not only does she open her closet to me, she’s an amazing listener and offers very sane advice. She’s traveling at the moment, and I’ve had to remind myself more than once so far that I can’t just pick up the phone and call her. I’ll have a lot saved up for us to catch up on! 
Have a fabulous vacation!
And Estella, I’m so sorry to hear about your sister–what wonderful friend you have!
by Fedora
on April 15th, 2008 at 5:13 pm
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Hi Joanne! You are right friend are the best medicine. My best friend that I have had since I was 5 years old was always there when I needed her. She was there for me when my mother died and also when my father died. She always said they were her parents to. Her parents are still living but I will be there for her when they pass. We have been friends for 48 years and we still keep in touch through e-mail and sometime plan a lunch together even we live a good distance apart.
by Virginia H.
on April 15th, 2008 at 6:14 pm
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When my 2 boys were young (they’re now both married) I had a close friend who had 3 girls. Between the two of us we were able to keep each other sane.
by Joyce
on April 15th, 2008 at 7:20 pm
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Hi Joanne!
I would have to say that my mother-in-law is my best friend. I can talk to her about anything. I’ve been having a lot of trouble sleeping at night because I seem to have little panic attacks as soon as I lay down and end up reading into the early morning hours. My mother-in-law lives an hour away but just talking to her on the phone always helps me. I don’t call her in the middle of the night but we talk during the day almost every day. I can’t imagine life without her.
by Janet
on April 15th, 2008 at 8:47 pm
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I have a couple of frinds that I know I can depend on. One of my friends and I were there for each other last year when a friend of ours passed away suddenly. She helped me cope with what was a very difficult and emotionally draining time.
by Linda F
on April 15th, 2008 at 9:16 pm
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My friend Bertie is my sounding board, shoulder to cry on(even though we
live hundreds of miles apart) and support. She has been there for me through
a divorce, a re-marriage, depression, loss of both parents, etc. I feel so much
better most of the time after talking to her. I sure hope we can meet once again
before we get too old.
by RobynL
on April 15th, 2008 at 11:49 pm
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I wish I had alot of friends…I only have friends who are coworkers. I also consider my mom or my siblings someone I can talk to. I don’t go out so much, so I am mostly at home or at work and I haven’t had a chance to make friends. It would be nice to have someone who I can talk about things or a shoulder to cry on or anything.
by Amelia
on April 16th, 2008 at 12:33 am
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My sister is my best friend. She shares all of life’s ups & downs with me. I’ve had other close friends but life gets in the way …marriage , children, distance , but sisters stay close and stay in touch.
Have a great break!!
by Laurie G
on April 16th, 2008 at 5:56 am
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I’m checking in from Florida where– believe it or not– I managed to catch the cold to end all colds 
. Still, we’re having fun and I’ve enjoyed reading the thread this morning! My sister ranks as one of my nearest and dearest too. And, like Janet, I’m fortunate to have a steadfast friend in my m-i-l. Who else would understand what I put up with in my husband?? 
Estella, hugs on the loss of your sister. What a wonderful friend to take such good care of you at a traumatic time. And Aztec, I’ve heard migraine pain is wretched, wretched stuff. Sounds like your friend knew just what to do!
I promise to check back in with prize winners when it’s closer to time for me to be home and I can ship things…. in the mean time, the friend stories are cheering me as I sniffle my way through vacation!
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***Winner!!*** Congratulations to Amelia, winner of the thread prize! Amelia, I sent you an email address… just zip me a shipping address at joanne@joannerock.com and I’ll mail out your prize!
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***Winner!!*** Congratulations to Amelia, winner of the thread prize! Amelia, I sent you an email… just zip me a shipping address at joanne@joannerock.com and I’ll mail out your prize!
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wtg amelia
by kim h
on April 20th, 2008 at 1:00 am
