I’m looking at my bookshelf that’s is waaaay too full. I see some really bad, bad covers and I’m noticing some really horrid titles! Ones I’m sure no author in her right mind would ever give to her book. And…I’m sorry to say…one of my books leads the pack in that department.
Court-Appointed Marriage. Yep, that’s mine, all right. My first book. And, NO, I did not give it that title. I think I originally called it The Last Chance Marriage…or something like that. Okay, I know what you’re thinking, my title wasn’t much better, but at least it was a little better, right? Maybe?
And what about Fart Proudly. I saw this little gem at the bookstore yesterday. Yikes! Then there’s The Secret Life of Bees. ‘course it’s a fab book but what a stupid title. What about Lord of the Deep? Holy crap! And then there’s Sex With a Tree. I kid you not, it’s really a book title.
Do you think these bad titles hurt sales or help? I mean when you see a really rotten title don’t you just have to pick it up? See, it gets the book in your hand and that’s exactly what the bookseller wants. Maybe those crafty publishers know what they’re doing after all.
So I’m asking you for the worse book title you’ve come across. (Not the worse book.) I’ll give away a copy of The Morgue the Merrier (Kensington Zebra 9/07. To read an excerpt DianneCastell.com)
Have a good weekend!
Dianne Castell
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Interesting topic Dianne. There’s a book out there called “Big Spankable Asses” by some great authors from the Aphrodisia line. Now I like some of their books, but the title would not entice me to buy it. If I heard great reviews about it, I would give it a chance, but most likely not before then.
by Stacy ~
on September 28th, 2007 at 5:22 am
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I don’t have a specific title in mind, but in general, I dislike the Harlequin Presents titles — The Spanish Trillionaire’s Virgin Bride’s Baby’s Revenge — or some such nonsense. The stories might be great, but the titles are silly. That said, they sell well throughout the world, so apparently the titles work for sales!
by Gail Barrett
on September 28th, 2007 at 5:37 am
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Hi, Stacy and Gail.
I so agree with both of you.
Some of the Presents go over the top with all their “hook” titles. And as for the spanking book. Weeeeeeeeell, at least you know what you’re getting.
And as for being the first two to respond to my post I’ll send you each a copy of The Morgue the Merrier. 
(I’ll still send two more out to others who comment)
Send me your addresses at DianneCastell@hotmail.com
by Dianne Castell
on September 28th, 2007 at 6:53 am
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Hi Gail… me too the Presents titles are so unsassy. The Brazilian Boss’s Innocent Mistress by Sarah Morgan…. HUH who cares and it is really horrible… I don’t need to know that the heroine is a virgin in the title!!!
by Nathalie
on September 28th, 2007 at 8:55 am
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I don’t like the erotica titles or sensual books in general… too explicit and they don’t entice me to buy them even if they say it is a super growing market.
by Lily
on September 28th, 2007 at 8:58 am
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I came across a book called “The Disobedient Virgin”. It maybe a good book but it’s not one I’d buy.
by Tammy G.
on September 28th, 2007 at 9:09 am
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The only ones I can think of are the Harlequin Presents titles like Gail said.
by Stacy S
on September 28th, 2007 at 9:41 am
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Hi Dianne,
I have to agree that the Harlequin Presents titles are not always the best, especially they sound so much alike that it is really confusing.
by Danny
on September 28th, 2007 at 9:53 am
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I love BIG SPANKABLE ASSES, Stacy. It makes me giggle, and makes me curious to what is between the pages. It might also be because my bestest bud, Kimberly Kaye Terry is in the book and came up with the concept. 
The worst title I’ve seen… Whore
Now, that doesn’t make me giggle, it makes me cringe. LOL
by Vivi Anna
on September 28th, 2007 at 10:54 am
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Bad titles are such a turn-off that I rarely take a second look at the book, which means I’ve probably missed loads of good reads. Like the others, I don’t care for the Harlequin Presents titles and think that Sex With A Tree is a stitch (must be a book about woodpeckers………hehehe.)
by Karen B
on September 28th, 2007 at 11:24 am
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I can’t think of any horrible book titles. I know I didn’t like The Secret Life of Bees either. I would say I am kind of sick of titles being so similar. It gets confusing after a while!
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I, also, do not like the Harlequin Presents titles. How do you tell them apart after a while? Anything with virgin in the title turns me off—-too much info, too soon.
by Estella
on September 28th, 2007 at 1:50 pm
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Green 61 by Cody Fowler Davis was an awful title for a book that I enjoyed. It is the story of two rival lawyers, one ethical the other not so much, and the battle between them in the courtroom. If it hadn’t come highly recommend by someone I completely trust I’d have skipped it.
by Susan
on September 28th, 2007 at 1:52 pm
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Some titles I have disliked upon hearing right away are Being Randy by Ashlyn Chase and The Naked Butler by Tuesday Morrigan. The stories might turn out to be wonderful but the titles are so silly.
by Cherie J
on September 28th, 2007 at 2:21 pm
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I don’t like romance titles that refer to places like “The Inn at Oak Creek”. It just strikes me as odd. It doesn’t even sound like a romance title.
by Crystal B.
on September 28th, 2007 at 2:32 pm
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I don’t have anything specific in mind but I don’t like any titles with the words mistress or virgin.. I definitely wouldn’t wanna be caught reading books titled anything of that sort.. Just kidding.. I read Presents only in my room otherwise it’d made me look a very romantic person and I don’t want to give that fact away.
by Mona
on September 28th, 2007 at 2:44 pm
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Very intersting titles. Dont know how I could beat them. Have to think on it.
by Pat L.
on September 28th, 2007 at 4:24 pm
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Any book that starts with “The Lord of ..” or something Mistress just makes me cringe. I don’t know why but I don’t like it. And bad title really do hurt a book, because it’s one of the first things the reader sees. I know I’ve passed several books because of their crappy titles, no matter how wonderful the story was. It’s the same thing with covers.
If it’s any consolation, I liked your original title better! 
by Wendy
on September 28th, 2007 at 4:24 pm
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I am reading what the ladies here are saying and agree I dont like the HP titles either, especially with Virgin in the title - agree with Mona.
by Pat L.
on September 28th, 2007 at 4:25 pm
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I have thousands of books and granted some don’t have great titles but I couldn’t find anything as “bad” as the ones you mentioned. I really have to say it definitely would stop me from buying the book (maybe that’s why none of the ones I have are that horrible lol). I’m afraid I would never pick the book up to even read the blurb so it wouldn’t have a chance. A lot of the erotica titles have not so great names but then they aren’t my kind of books so maybe that’s why I think that.
by catslady
on September 28th, 2007 at 5:42 pm
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Whoppi Goldberg has a book out called BOOK.
by Maureen
on September 28th, 2007 at 6:23 pm
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I’m another one of those who doesn’t really like the titles of the Presents line But, they do tell you something about the book. I hate when you get a book because the title leads you to think it’s about one thing and then once you finish reading you can’t figure how the title fits in.
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I agree that big spankable ass is a bad name for a title and the to me the cover is almost as bad. Looks like a porn book for males. Granted I would probably pick up the book in the store just to make sure I wasn’t seeing things. Also I’m looking at one called Ill Wind not sure where than name came from. It was recommended so I bought so as soon as I get to read it we’ll see if its any good.
by Pamk
on September 28th, 2007 at 8:37 pm
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spankable asses this is strange, and words with virgin in it, kind of silly now
by kim h
on September 28th, 2007 at 11:43 pm
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I agree that some of the titles are bit kinky but some are creative. I hate the titles that are over used…… The Wedding Wager( Cathy Maxwell, Deborah Hale), The Marriage Wager ( Candace Camp) or Cowboy Tears, Cowboy Trouble etc boring!
by Laurie
on September 29th, 2007 at 5:38 am
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I’ve seen several people mention “Big Spankable Asses”, which is the most outrageous title I’ve seen lately too. Still, it does grab the attentembarassed ion, so maybe that’s the point. I just can’t see myself taking it up to the counter to pay lol. I don’t generally get embarrassed buying books with more erotic covers or titles, but I’ve got to say I think “Big Spankable Asses” would do it.
by Zara
on September 29th, 2007 at 7:05 pm
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Sorry about the previous post. Somehow the word embarrassed got in the middle of another word. That’s what I get for attempting to multi-task lol. I obviously cannot type while talking on the phone.
by Zara
on September 29th, 2007 at 7:13 pm
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O.k. I once had a book titled, I DREAMED I MARRIED PERRY MASON. For real! O.k. and then there is this title, HICKORY DICKORY STALK. I think they were trying to hard to be clever. Then some of Luanne Rice’s book titles I don’t like such as HOME FRIES. Also, I don’t care for book titles with food in it such as THE ANGEL CRAVED LOBSTER by Shirley Jump. The book was good but I just didn’t care for the title. The cover art caught my attention more than the title did.
by Michele L.
on September 29th, 2007 at 10:24 pm
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I think it depends on the title. If its too long I think why dont you just write the book on the cover. Other titles that are bad can do well I think if the writer behind the book is recognizable.Like Laurie mentioned titles that are overused can be confusing to me because I ‘ll think I already read that book but then find out it was another author!
by Dena
on September 30th, 2007 at 8:05 pm
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Zara, I agree. I would be really embarrassed to buy a book called Big Spankable Asses, too. I can just see me standing at the checkout counter while some teenaged male cashier tries not to snicker. I would definitely have to order it online. Maybe they were going for the shock value when they chose that title? It certainly does conjure up images…. 
I think that title is a definite contender for the worst. I wonder if there is a contest out there?
by Gail Barrett
on October 1st, 2007 at 5:48 am
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Howdy, All!!!!!!!!!
I was at a conference in Columbus and just got back. This has been such a fun blog with soooo many comments. Thanks!
As for virgin titles… When I was at the conference we were trying to decide if you hadn’t had “any” for five years does that make you a virgin again?
It was a fun conference, wish you all could have been there.
Hugs, Dianne
by Dianne Castell
on October 1st, 2007 at 8:53 am
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Dianne,
sounds like you had a great time in Columbus
by Danny
on October 1st, 2007 at 9:43 am
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Conference was great!! I love seeing the readers and chatting about books.
And some of those repeat titles… Sometimes I think the editors take all those “hook” words like cowboy, baby, wedding, virgin, bride, etc, put them on a wall and throw three darts that become the title. The Cowboy’s Bride Baby.
by Dianne Castell
on October 2nd, 2007 at 7:47 am
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LOL. I love the idea with the darts. I heard that Harlequin choose the titles for their author, how is the situation with the other publishers?
by Danny
on October 2nd, 2007 at 9:47 am
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I loved the excerpt on The Morgue the Merrier. I have looked at walmart for it so far they don’t have it yet. I live in a small town and that happens to be our only book store alone with what books the food store might carry. But I’ll keep looking.
by Tammy G.
on October 3rd, 2007 at 9:04 am
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I finally picked the book winners. Sorry it’s taken sooooo long.
I picked Danny, Vivy Ann and Karen B.
Send me your snail addy and I’ll send you books.
Hugs, Dianne
DianneCastell@hotmail.com
by Dianne Castell
on October 3rd, 2007 at 9:46 am
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Wohoo thanks so much Dianne.
Congrats to Vivi and Karen
by Danny
on October 3rd, 2007 at 12:48 pm
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wtg ladies
by kim h
on October 3rd, 2007 at 11:51 pm
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Congratulations winners!!!
by Tammy G.
on October 4th, 2007 at 7:49 am
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Thanks so much, Dianne - and congrats to Vivy Ann and Danny!
by Karen B
on October 6th, 2007 at 4:54 pm
