It’s Not The Destination. . .
Our relationships with others are often the most rewarding moments in our lives. I am sometimes awed by the deepness I have achieved from the many people in my own life. I am thankful that the number of people that I love continues to grow. I’m rewarded by how much I gain from each new person I meet and each old friend I keep. There is an adage that people come into your life for a reason. They are there to help you in some way—realize a dream, expand your horizons, or simply for comfort.
I don’t know what I would do without my critique group. If I receive a rejection my three writing pals will say, “That ______ doesn’t know what they’re talking about. Their loss.” Or my daughter who always looks at things outside the box. When something happens I perceive as a disaster, she’ll say, “You don’t know, Mom. This could be the best thing that ever happened to you.” And most of the time, she’s right. Or my father and mother who just say, “We’re proud of your achievements.”
I also don’t know what I would do without the many people who read and enjoy my books. The ones who write to me and tell me so. Often writers are plagued with self-doubts. They can sometimes become debilitating. The fear of not being able to follow up after your last sensational book, the fear that you don’t have what it takes, and the fear of not receiving that next contract. These are all real and terrible dilemmas of the publishing author and every writer feels them. In fact, I’m sure every artist feels them. I can’t say how many times I’ve felt very down after I’d just received a rejection or I’m worried that I won’t get my next scene as perfect as I want it. I’ll go to my e-mail to procrastinate—I’m very good at that—and inevitably there’ll be a message from a reader who simply adores my writing.
The power of words is why I fell in love with writing. Simple words strung together can make you laugh or cry or sing. Each person that comes into your life is like that one word. It has meaning, brings some miracle of understanding and opportunity. Each one holds its own special meaning.
Just think about your own friends and family. The special people in your life. For me, it’s my parents, the way they bicker with each other as a way of showing affection and is a great amusement to me. My children when we pull out our memories like diamonds and talk about their brilliance. My friend Heidi with her intense exuberance emanating from a soul that so potent it shines from her like a sun.
This also holds true for people in your life that are gone. Like my Uncle John whose laugh I can still remember and the way he would visit my grandmother every week to brighten her day. My grandfather and the way he would tease us and chase us until we laughed until we cried. The soft brown eyes of King, our family pet, and the way they would brighten when he saw you.
The richness of relationships isn’t a mirror that reflects who we are. No it’s more of a portal to take a look at who we are, what is important to us. Relationships mine the deepness of our hearts and souls and give us the gems of moments, strings in time that bring us to our final destination. It is after all the journey that’s important, not how we got to where we are in the end.
Novels are completely and wholly about relationships and our own relationships are fodder for the taking—the feelings, emotions and experience all there to be used. Every time I write a book, I dedicate it to someone. Someone whose spirit is bright and shining and just fits.
Celebrate others in any way you can. Publicly, silently, with touch or gifts, or words. For they are your journey, your experience, your life.
Find a way to express how you feel about someone in your life right now. Let us know what it is if you can. I’ll give away one of my backlist books to a winner by Wednesday at 5:00.
See you next time.
Karen
